Thankful (again)

I spent my fourth Tuesday with patients and I come away feeling more and more thankful that being a nurse is something that makes my heart sing -- rather than making my heart crumble.

I can't say much about my patients at all. But I can say, safely, that I've seen people with all sorts of maladies -- the type that creep up as a surprise, the sort that people wait for, the kind that have a clear answer and the ones that perplex everyone. I've seen patients who are hopeful, patients who are depressed and patients who shrug their shoulders about the facts of their lives.

Being with people during their tough times is amazing. I'm proud that I'm the sort of person who can make them smile, or listen to their worries, or explain things well, or just clean them up so they feel a little better. I've done some mildly medical stuff as a student nurse, but I'm absolutely positive that the diaper-changing, smiling and conversations matter more.

I could definitely the hospital feeling defeated. It's rough. Lots of people are hospitalized for a mess of ailments that don't have a good outcome. At rounds everyone talks about helping patients heal, but there are people who don't heal no matter what happens.

I come home (today after donating blood -- seriously long day) feeling like nursing is right for me. Feeling like my communication skills, strong stomach, understanding of science and smile can do a lot for people.

That, and a hot shower, sound pretty good right now.